@WheelTod: That awkward moment when you lazily follow someone cos of 1 funny joke, then realize all the rest of their stuff is KKK recruitment material
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@_Tempo11: I wonder if my dog gets embarrassed when I give him kisses in front of other dogs at the park.
@KyleMcDowell86: [Old lady] Please dont pet my dog. She's a service dog [Me] Omg I'm so sorry (stands up straight & salutes dog) Thank you for your service
@ericsshadow: 20's: I can't remember where I left my keys 30's: I can't remember where I left my car 40's: I can't remember where I left my kids
@dlockw21: *First Date Her: Why are we at Home Depot? Me: I wanted to see what it's like to pick out bathroom tile with you. See if this is worth it.