@TheGabbieShow: that horrifying moment when a kid asks u to help find his mom bc he was always told if he was lost to ask a grownup & u realize ur a grownup
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@iAmDelFreaky: Waking up with morning wood is one thing, but waking with Elijah Wood is just creepy. I calmed down once I stared into his beautiful eyes.
@Thynebear: *walks up to bouncer* "sorry pal, this is a private country club" *peeks inside* [everybody's fist pumping hard as heck to kenny chesney]