@_ISpeakTrue: That moment when you make out with the air trying to find the straw in your glass
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@Brampersandon_: [quickly jumps into the back of a cab] ME: How far will this get me? *i hand the driver 14 peanut m&ms with the chocolate sucked off*
@AbbyHasIssues: Despite evidence to the contrary, I still maintain typing louder and harder will magically make my incorrect password correct.
@mollzbenn: The same friends who used to pressure me as a teen to drink & do drugs now pressure me as an adult to eat chia seeds & do crossfit.