@eliyudin: that show "Intervention" should just be called "Haters"
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@Book_Krazy: Me: *[pulls back shower curtain] "Dinner will be ready in 10 minutes" Him: "Who the hell are you and should I be scared?"
@mylifesuckers: Husband: Let's talk about it when we're not tired and cranky. Me: So, in like 18 years?
@JohnLyonTweets: I'm not saying your perfume is too strong. I'm just saying the canary was alive before you got here.
@QueenKillerBee: Tried my hand at this whole 'cougar' business but I just don't like the taste of hikers. It's possible I read the wrong Wikipedia page.