@NYC_Blonde: That touchdown dance is exactly the same as mine when I wake up in a guy's apartment and his furnished apartment has a nice view.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Sean_Burgundy_: Her: Why did you cancel your gym membership? Me: There were some changes in the vending machines that I didn't agree with
@foodandwhining: People with eyebrow, nose, and lip piercings always look like they landed face-first into a tackle box.
@lilgapeach30: It's like my daddy always says...if you can't beat 'em, arrange to have 'em beaten.
@_ElvishPresley_: [commercial for boiling water] *enemies at castle wall are splashed with cool refreshing water* castle guard: there must be a better way!