@GrandadJFreeman: That walk of shame when you fail at throwing a ball of paper into the garbage.
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@CrackYouWhip: My workout schedule: 1. Run half mile 2. 10 reps of 5 lb. hand weights 3. 35 year break 4. Protein shake 5. Repeat
@joci2203: [first date] Him: Why are you being so distant? Me: Why didn't you order a side of guacamole?
@leahlovescheez: My gynecologist recognized me at the grocery store, so I guess I need to start wearing longer skirts.