@DougBenson: That was the most exciting race between two stationary vehicles I have ever seen. #GreaseLive
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@UncleDuke1969: *takes coffee from hot barista *makes eye contact *smiles *winks *sips scalding coffee "Thankth, thexy! Theeya!" *walks outside *screams
@iRowlf: I'd like to return this pack of gum. They taste awful. "Sir, those are Band-Aids." Oh, I'd like to return these Band-Aids. Someone ate some.
@mindintheshadow: I should probably eat this entire bag of Oreos tonight since they're going to expire in 2017.