@ranndrew: "Thats a killer dirt bike you've got, man!"
*dirt bike holds a knife to your throat*
Believe me...I know.
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@MasterOfFury: Everything goes as planned when nothing's planned.
@weenbeans: *barber hands me the mirror to check the back* "Looks good!" I lie, after a few seconds of being unable to get the mirror to angle properly
@lovemydogduck: My best friend just ask me to be her maid of honor. What did I ever do to her???
@Midgetspar: Stole my neighbors family portrait & got it tattooed on my back. Now I'm standing in their living room facing the wall 2 see if they notice.
@Fuqyoupayme: If school isn't the place to sleep, then home isn't the place to study.
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