@shahrouzt: The amount of times I've had to say no to the Adobe Updater has totally prepared me to be a parent.
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@baseballchickie: First rule of being Italian is to tell everyone you're Italian. (I can say this cause I'm Italian.)
@SamGrittner: *job interview* "Where do you see yourself in five years?" "Mirrors, puddles of water. Basically anything with a reflective surface."
@KevinFarzad: What's being in love feel like? You know when someone cancels plans you wanted to cancel anyway? Almost as good as that.
@rachxthompson: me: could my thighs get any bigger? *sits down* me: oh look now they're the size of Australia