@shahrouzt: The amount of times I've had to say no to the Adobe Updater has totally prepared me to be a parent.
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@PerfectPending: Husband: I'm going to take kids to do something fun today so you can relax. Me: sounds awesome! H: Will you get them ready for me?
@Mr_Kapowski: Guy 1: Women love a man that's well read Guy 2: Got it [date] Woman: So what- Guy 2: *covered in ketchup* How well do you like me red?
@therealeatwood: Did you see saw? I saw Saw. You see Saw II? I saw Saw II too. Going to see Saw IV? I didn’t see Saw III, what am I going to see Saw IV for?