@TheTweetOfGod: The Apple Watch may become so addictive it keeps people from looking at what's truly important in life, like their iPhones.
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@BuckyIsotope: WISE MAN #1: I brought gold for the babe WISE MAN #2: frankincense WISE MAN #3: myrrh ME: *pulls out Chili’s gift card* I hate you guys
@AaronFullerton: Doctor: "I'm sorry, sir, but you have an STD. I suggest you make a list of all your partners--" Lou Bega: "Way ahead of you."
@Reverend_Scott: DOCTOR: Push again, the baby is- MOTHER: IS SOMETHING WRONG? DOCTOR: [holding phone] No, I just caught a Jigglypuff up in there.