@robdelaney: The baby daddies on 16 & Pregnant/Teen Mom should be used to test air bags.
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@badbanana: The sincerest form of flattery is having a robot from the future sent back in time to kill you. Imitation is a distant second.
@DaddyJew: Librarian: can I check you out? Me: sure [spins around] Librarian: I meant your book Me: oh yea, that makes way more sense
@KentWGraham: I used to sing my daughter to sleep at night, which is probably why her first word was “Stop.”