@AGreaterMonster: The beauty of meditation is it helps instill inner peace in someone that makes it easy to pick his pockets.
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@FattMernandez: Are there Jewish exorcisms? Where the demon comes out, and just tells you to call your mother?
@1_swarthy_dude: You have to kiss a lot of short, black, flamboyant musicians before you can find your Prince.
@MarkusJ: *first astronaut lands on Mars* NASA: How does it feel son? Astronaut: Feels pretty good to be 33 million miles away from Dave Matthews Band