@JaneBadall: The best revenge is living well, unless you own a flamethrower.
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@Bluestmoon_: 78% of parenting is spent anxiously praying they don't notice the minuscule lego piece you just vacuumed up.
@SexytotheNorth: The Cheesecake Factory is finally coming to Canada! ...now I can stop being so nice to the Americans.
@KateWhineHall: Dear parents who line up 45 minutes early in the school pick-up line, I don't understand.
@OhNoSheTwitnt: Am I original? -Yeaaah. Am I the only one? -Yeaaah. Do you wanna build a snowman? -Go away, Anna. Ok byyyyye.