@Cheeseboy22: The best way to infuriate a mom is to open a second box of something when there's still a box of the same thing already open.
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@Reverend_Scott: Prince: Rapunzel, let down your hair. Rapunzel: Hair, you'll never be beautiful, you'll always have split ends. *hair is super let down*
@aidanjsears: ME: i'm nervous WIFE: don't be. just be confident [later] BOSS: so do you think you'd be right for the job ME: *confidently* no
@TheCatWhisprer: ME [as a kid]: i won't be a grumpy old man ME [now]: *gets mad at a car for being orange*
@Travon: "Hey Hillary what color do you think this dre-- never mind" - Bill Clinton scrolling through Twitter last night