@samuelhlowe: The best way to return any clothing left at your place is to do a drive-by with a t-shirt gun on her wedding day.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jazmasta: Ever think about an old friend and wonder what they're doing right now? They're playing on their phone. Everyone is playing on their phone.
@protolalia: You can make up any word you want in conversation and if you use it in a dilsationary way, people rarely question the meaning.
@_SingleBabyMama: I figured out the best time to go grocery shopping these days is at 3:45 AM, before the Girl Scouts even wake up. Ha, I'll show them.
@EndhooS: I invited Alan over for dinner. "Alan Jacobs? Or Alan who thinks he's Captain America?" *a badly painted bin lid smashes through the window*