@robdelaney: The best ways to spell the name Sean: 1. Sean 2. Shawn 3. Shaun 4. Chone 5. Shnzzang 6. Beans! 7. Ulurion 8. Shon?
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@MBittersweet25: You tell me to get off my high horse? Why dont you tell the damn horse to stop getting high all the time.. His drug problem isn't my problem
@FatherWithTwins: 4yo: I want to play squirt guns Me: You mean when you squirt me all day and laugh, and if I squirt you, you cry? 4yo: YES Me: Okay, let's go
@trevso_electric: "Smells fresh. Like a tropical island." "Ok. Now take off the blindfold! Your family's been dead in this car for a week! We Febrezed it!"