@HallpassCanada: The "Beware of Cat" sign posted outside my house doesn't seem to be having the desired affect.
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@DONTJIMMYMEJULZ: My Masseuse just read 'Cinderella' to me ~ That's the last time I ask for a happy ending.
@myles_morrison: Any girl who says she's not the jealous type will change her tune when another girl phones you drunk at 3am.
@Jake_Vig: PRIEST: Do you take this this woman, to have and to hold, for better, for worse, until death do you part? ME: Well, now you made it weird.