@treydayway: The Bible would be more believable if Adam was tempted by a slice of pizza instead.
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@KateWhineHall: I'm eating a vegan lunch today. Sure, it's six sleeves of Smarties and a Diet Coke, but I'm still better than you.
@robfee: Past elections: Which candidate will most improve our country? 2016 election: Which candidate is least likely to start The Purge?
@thexythara: If I say "I don't know, let me look", I'm really just spinning around in my chair a few times while you're on hold.
@BlairLoudly: Me: SPIDER! Brain: Nope, fluff. Me: SPIDER! Brain: That is a fly. Me: SPIDER!!! Brain: sigh. That's your hand idiot.