@Tmoney68: The biggest lie in advertising is someone taking a bite of a hard shell taco & it not immediately exploding in their hands.
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@junejuly12: Ever get home, look at your hair in a mirror, and wonder how many small children you terrified while you were out
@daemonic3: DOCTOR: You should lose some weight ME: Ok I'll consider it VET: Your dog should lose some weight ME: Hey bud, you're going on a diet!
@DurtMcHurtt: Wow, the guy buried alive with weed in his pocket must be rolling in his grave right now.
@MarfSalvador: Wildebeest: 5 cheetahs on the horizon sir Wildebeest Sergeant: How many men do we have? Wildebeest: 4,000 Wildebeest Sergeant: RETREAT!