@Ratchet7Don: The cashier seemed to appreciate that I bagged my own groceries until I unpacked them all and said, "That's how I want you to do it."
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@Im_Tricia: There's no way that Cinderella was treated like shit her entire life, then a prince tells her he loves her & she wasn't like "yeah right."
@TheToddWilliams: [apiary] ME: Are you the beekeeper? BEEKEEPER: Yup ME: Can I get some? BEEKEEPER: Nope ME: Is it because you k— BEEKEEPER: I keep them
@GrandadJFreeman: That walk of shame when you fail at throwing a ball of paper into the garbage.
@3sunzzz: If you can't get your baby to stop crying, try vacuuming. Then you can't hear your baby crying and your floors will be clean.