@jokeymcjokeface: The celebrity couple name for Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton is Clump.
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@MuttCutts: "Lloyd, could you keep your eyes on the road, please?" Oh. Yea. Good thinkin'. Can't be too careful. A lot of bad drivers out there.
@SpicyGinger69: She ran her fingers through my hair and pulled hard. I wanted to ask her to do it harder - but probably inappropriate for the hair salon.
@poe927: Her: You should drink in moderation Me: Moderation?You makin words up? H: You're gonna piss on my lawn again aren't you? M: ...In moderation
@abbycohenwl: Me: I know panty hose are a little dated but I love how they even out my skin tone Bank Teller: So is this not a robbery? Me: No, It is