@kelkulus: The Church of England rejected female bishops. How can women's rights expect to move forward if they're not even allowed to move diagonally?
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@SondraDeeMe: ME: I have the blood of my enemies on my face and hands BF: That’s salsa [last taco on my plate is visibly shaking]
@grievre: 20 yr old me: dude holy shit you have to try ecstasy 30 yr old me: dude holy shit you have to try using properly sharpened kitchen knives
@Whymze: [pulls out acoustic guitar at a funeral] alright everyone stop being all [finger quotes] sad this next 1 is dedicated to a very sexy widow.
@arealliveghost: if I were in a comic book I would never wear clothes, I would just constantly scream a huge speech bubble over my body