@markydoodoo: The closest I get to exercising is when I trip on the sidewalk and pretend jog for like 10 feet.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@beefman138: [Logging in] • Password must be 6 digits Me : *Types "6 digits"* Computer : You are an imbecile.
@XplodingUnicorn: My toddler took her toy phone and hit me in the head with it. It was still less painful than a real phone call.
@bobvulfov: turn-ons: • eye contact • people who pay attention to me • people who know how to push my buttons • oh god im a television • how did this h―
@CourtRundell: My parents waited way too long to tell me about Santa and the Easter Bunny. I was so mad I got in my car & drove away.