@Diane_7A: The closest I've come to being an athlete is using Adobe Acrobat.
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@_davidlucas_: *Answers door naked* Jehovah's Witnesses... 😲 Me: Do you have a moment to let me tell you about my sex life? Here, have this pamphlet.
@TheTweetOfGod: Media, stop using the phrase 'breaking news'. It's been broken for some time now.