@kyry5: The Constitution has barely been altered in 200 years, but my $300 textbook is worth $0.82 bc they came out with a new edition mid-semester.
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@MavenofHonor: Listen, I've been stuck atop this condemned lighthouse for weeks now, and you don't hear me complaining. No one does
@Gre_Gone: *caches football thrown from off screen* "Are you having problems with slow interne*video starts buffering*
@AngelaEhh: This liquid diet crap is a scam. I've been drinking beer since last Tuesday and I'm still fat.
@thatUPSdude: Turns out police dislike it when you slip out of your handcuffs. Even if you do say "ABRACADABRA" when you do it.