@degg: the cvs cashier asked me how im doing as i put some diarrhea medicine on the counter. "not great man ive got diarrhea" i told him
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@smithsara79: OB-GYN: Ever consider having kids? Me: *remembers the time I heard some man tell a little girl to smile & she told him to die* Just once.
@ClaytonSykes: I was simply stating that your crying child MIGHT fit comfortably in the overhead compartment, lady. #butseriously
@Tmoney68: A man played Justin Bieber to force an attacking bear to run off. He was treated for his injuries, then arrested for cruelty to animals.