@weinerdog4life: The date was going great until she spooked me and then I squirted her with ink and quickly swam away
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@FattMernandez: You guys ever smear fake blood on your mouth, put on a ripped shirt, go in somewhere and pretend you got mugged? PEOPLE ARE SO NICE!
@TheDailySchmuck: I'm not racist. Some of my best friends are white such as Joey, Phoebe and Rachel. And I can't forget Chandler.