@Contwixt: The day we decided such footwear would be called "flip-flops" was not our most creative moment.
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@markhoppus: The salon where my wife is getting her hair cut has a copy of Playboy on the magazine table. I feel like this is test.
@Kyle_Lippert: NOAH'S GOOGLE HISTORY 1) What is an ark? 2) How 2 build ark 3) Can god just build ark? 4) Are snakes necessary? 5) Is god real or am I high?
@Underchilde: If you drop food on the floor in public, it’s proper etiquette to look around and see who noticed before shoving it in your mouth.
@batkaren: Accidentally ran the wash with Ecstasy still in a back pocket. Now my jeans are freaking out, and the zipper won't stop grinding its teeth.