@kelkulus: The difference between men and women is that for men, "stabby" is not an emotion.
@ShoutingGoddess: I see your choices and raise you one eyebrow.
@CantWaitToNap: When a cop tells you to "spread 'em" he is not flirting. I know this now.
@_NTFG_: CW: What did you do on the weekend?
ME: I baked
CW: Nice. What did you bake?
@GrantTanaka: My wife is gone for the next 3 days, so if any ladies out there want to come over & yell at me to take out the garbage & not have sex, hmu
@WyanRilson: The hardest part of potty training my puppy is shitting outside with him so he can learn how to