@kumailn: The director of "A Girl in the River" went to high school with me in Karachi! She won an Oscar! This is not gonna help w my parents. #Oscars
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@gingerfaced: What do you mean you were really drunk? I already changed my Facebook relationship status for you.
@KKAlThani: Drink coffee. It saves lives. One cup will decrease your chances of murdering someone in the morning.
@markleggett: I don't see any former child prodigies/spelling bee champions solving any of the world's problems. Thanks for nothing, you little burn-outs.