@Xoolun: The doctor told me I need more greens in my diet.
So I have no switched to mint Oreos.
@KalvinMacleod: [Speech Therapy]
Therapist: Repeat after me: I’m thirsty
T: I’m hungry
D: I’m…H...Hi Hungry, I’m Dad
T: *throws clipboard*
@LindseyEllison2: If you want to look mysterious I would suggest painting your cornea with a sharpie. Always works for me.
@InternetHippo: [thoughts of person talking to me]: He's furrowing his brow, he must really be listening!
[my brain]: How do cows make cheese
@HeyJennyConway: English: i before e, except after c.
Science: Ummmm, No.