@Xoolun: The doctor told me I need more greens in my diet.
So I have no switched to mint Oreos.
@1_swarthy_dude: *uses Mr. Clean magic eraser to wipe off your drawn on eyebrows*
@meat_tornado_: write your suicide note in frosting on a cake so no one can eat it and people will still hate you even though you are dead
@dumbbeezie: The first person to milk a cow was playing a savage game of Truth or Dare
@ilovepie84: "LET MY PEEPHOLE GO!"
-Moses when the cops found the peephole he installed in the Womens washroom.
@jaimekessel: Instead of a flower girl, I want a parmesan boy to sprinkle cheese down the aisle at my wedding