@GermanFreckles: The drunker I get, the more dance moves I know.
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@_TheGreatGrizz_: That moment you are trying to figure out if you are Joey, Ross, or Chandler and you realize you're Gunther.
@abhorrent_wife: Taught the 5yo to say "totes magotes" to annoy my husband who can't figure out why the kid keeps yelling, "COACH MY GOATS, DAD!" Nailed it.
@JohnHilsen: My "friend" Adam gave me an electric toothbrush for my birthday. Completely unnecessary. My gas-powered toothbrush still runs fine, "Adam."