@wickedsuga: The earth revolves around the sun. So, I guess if you want me to revolve around you, you're gonna have to set yourself on fire.
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@ShutUpThatsWho: SCIENTIST: if we feed cows seaweed we can slash greenhouse gas levels [later] SCIENTIST [watching dead cows float in the ocean]: well shit
@Duke1173: They ordered two extra large pizzas at work. I wonder what everyone else is going to eat.
@Cpin42: Some lady at Olive Garden died, so we’re rummaging through her stuff. Just like a real family.
@C_J_Commode: There is simply no need to add "NSFW" in your bio. This is twitter. None of us have jobs.