@jwoodham: The easiest way to find out if a movie is on Netflix is to simply ask yourself "do I want to see it?" If you do, it's not on Netflix.
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@DeanScott01: Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There's no need to remind him every six months about it.
@seriouslyamy: 3 days ago I put a sign on my door that said "I'll be back in 20 minutes". Nobody has bothered me since and I'm never taking it down.
@kadyngriffiths: Dream girl: -tall -skinny -can pull off wearing a hat -honest -a fan of the theater -abolished slavery -is Abraham Lincoln
@julieklausner: If I were Santa Claus, I'd have my agent be like "He's not doing it this year if Ronald McDonald is going to be there in that shoe car."