@mrjohntofu: The escalator at the gym is broken, this is BULLSHIT.
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@ahuj9: Hello is this HP? I'd like to make a return. I ordered a Laser Jet and you sent me a printer.
@slennonhugs: I'm a simple man *bites a pinecone* I enjoy simple things *tosses a gun into a lake* that's why I decided to let these bees live in my skull
@VenisVal: My friend's wife is so controlling. When they're together, he talks like he's filming a hostage video.