@russbengtson: The fact that Gunplay pulled a gun on his accountant doesn't shock me nearly as much as the fact that Gunplay has an accountant.
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@truegritrumble: KID: *is crying over school drama* ME: Don’t worry, kid. All this anxiety and insecurity will diminish as you get older- KID: *smiles hopefully up at me* ME: and turn into an ominous fear that’ll follow you to the grave.
@jwoodham: Just heard a dad threaten to spank his screaming son "in front of the world." Stand your ground, kid. There's no way he has that technology.
@Marcmywords2: Hey Dad, your neighbor called, they wanna know if you could turn down your TV, they've already heard this episode of Law & Order.