@jenniferfralic: The fact that jellyfish have survived for 650 million years despite not have brains is great news for stupid people.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@3sunzzz: [sips martini] *sigh* [sips margarita] Now THIS ONE is delicious! Waiter: Ma'am, you can't try drinks on other tables. Please sit down.
@michaelianblack: Police inspectors on British mystery shows always seem to know the murder victim. Moral: do not befriend any British police inspectors.
@CaseyMichelle__: Well if you didn't want me to fall in love with you, why did you tell me you had nachos?