@NeuroticMess: The first 30 years of childhood are always the hardest.
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@moxieblogger: If you want to know how Irish my family is, my parents don't have a liquor cabinet, they have a liquor closet Right next to the beer fridge
@gogglepossum: [me sneaking to the bathroom at night to check twitter] Wife: what are you doing? Me [looking around for excuse] just...changing my tampon
@OhMyBlondie: If you have your Twitter account linked to Facebook I don't think you understand what it is we do here.
@einsteinsexual: Stereotypes are just like regular types, except every time someone almost kills me, while I'm driving, it's an Asian person.