@TheBigBatman: The first 36 years of my childhood have been the hardest.
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@RegularFred: [Rorschach test] Patient: Leprechauns in cheetah print unitards kickflipping over flaming tree stumps Dr: I think we can skip the others
@eeethanford: But I would walk 500 miles and I would walk 500 more to be the man who walked 1000 miles to get away from you. I want a divorce.
@better_off_dad: *At the bank Robber:THIS IS A STICKUP! Me:Looks like a gun R:SHUT UP! M:Well, 'THIS IS A GUN' is way scarier Teller:He's got a point