@cervixsmash: The first caterpillar to turn into a butterfly must of been like YOOOOOOOOO
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@calamitydaisy: I feel a burst of superiority when I trick a fly into flying out of my car window.
@Brampersandon_: COWORKER: u got like 8 hickeys. Mustve been a fun weekend haha ME (remembering not to talk about octopus fight club): yea it got pretty wild
@mc_funbags: People keep telling me I behave like a man so I'm currently working up the courage to tell my husband he's gay.