@aligarchy: the fondue...? you mean, my drinking cheese?
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@PhriendlyCody: bank robber: everyone on the ground and drop whatever is in your hands!! me: [holding a $9 Starbucks coffee, a tear rolls down my cheek] no
@robfee: House Hunters: "We want a slide, cheeseburgers, a clown." Realtor: Are you describing McDonalds? "haha no" *3 kids tumble out of trenchcoat*
@LeBearGirdle: *Paranormal Factivity* [I walk into my bathroom] "OH MY GOD" ['WHALES ARE ACTUALLY MAMMALS' is written in blood on the mirror]