@envydatropic: The forecast isn't calling for rain so I'm just going to wash my car to prove the weatherman wrong
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@thatdutchperson: [does his regular grocery shopping] Cashier: having a kid's birthday party? Me: ...................yes.
@SINGING_GHOSTS: i imagine my dog spends a lot of time thinking about how tall i am and how great it is to have a giant as a best friend who can reach treats
@aligarchy: DR: you have this disease ME: oh no DR: but you can cure it with a healthy diet and exercise ME: OH NO