@kibblesmith: The genie sang that whole song about how he's gonna be Aladdin's best friend ever right in front of the monkey
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@TomMughal: I just got mistaken for an employee at a haunted house. Assume it's because I look authoritative not because I look like I'm wearing a mask.
@lovemydogduck: The best way to tell someone you don't like them is to text them 370HSSV 0773H and tell them to read it upside down.
@JeffLoveness: "I would absolutely say I'm an introvert!" - Guy screaming to his table full of friends at brunch.