@ryanchris: The Golden Globes is how everyone else on twitter gets revenge on sports fans.
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@TeaPainUSA: If Trump wins the presidency, you know who's gonna be the most excited about buildin' a Southern border fence? Canada.
@evecullen610: I didn't have to shower alone today..... Related.......why the hell are there spiders in the winter?
@doktorj: Enhanced interrogation idea: If waterboarding isn't working, try having my mother brush their hair.
@Gooooats: Me: I heard you like men with a huge collection of words that they know and can say. Her: A vocabulary? Me: A what?