@jfrank50: The grass looks greener on the other side because it's fertilized with bullshit.
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@EndhooS: Cop: can u describe your attacker Me: super aggressive, with a big nose & powerful arms Cop: u just described a seagull Me: he took my chips
@jimmytorosian: *Buys map of world, pins it up on wall* *Throws dart, swears to visit wherever it lands* *Visits the middle of the Atlantic Ocean*
@tech_pirate: 1 in 5 people are Chinese. Only 5 people in my family, it's either mom or dad, brother Colin, younger brother Ho Chan. I think it's Colin.