@moose_chocolate: The groundhog in our town died on Sunday. I can't imagine how long our winter will be now.
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@vikkaroni: I'll bet Timmy would never have fallen down that well if his parents would've coughed up the money for a HUMAN instead of a dog babysitter.
@Blarebare: My wife just said that Twilight is better than The Lost Boys. I don't think there's a jury in the world that would convict me.
@bencoffeehall: My dentist asked me if I had a problem with my gums bleeding. You'd have to be really laid back to not have a problem with that.