@12ozCourage: The guy at the urinal next to me must really like my wrist watch.
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@CornOnTheGoblin: "Did you remember to take the dog out?" Ah crap, I forgot [Dog storms in] I sat at the restaurant for HOURS
@Cheeseboy22: We can't afford to take our kids to a corn maze this year so we're going to take them to an IKEA instead.
@ibid78: My desires are unconfessional. No wait. Unconditional? Pumpkin sensual? I just had it. Undone sectionals? Unmoustachable? Stunned pistachio?