@Maxine12333: The gym is like church to some people. No matter what they do all week, they think they can erase it with one visit.
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@markydoodoo: [eraser factory] BOSS: what makes u think ur right for the job? ME: *hands him blank piece of paper* I think my resumé speaks for itself
@Fred_Delicious: History Trivia: In many photographs of Hitler,a golden retriever wearing a Nazi uniform can be seen. This is notorious war criminal Herr Bud
@TheTweetOfGod: Celebrity dumping an ice bucket on himself to raise money? Cute. Humanity dumping an ice cap on itself to raise sea levels? HILARIOUS.
@Manda_like_wine: Sorry I pretended I was drowning so you could see how incredible my hair looked underwater.