@Swishergirl24: The hardest part about going through a divorce is finding a hitman you can trust.
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@OkieGirl405: Guns don't kill people People that have 5 kids, 1 cat, 2 ex-mother-in-laws & work 50 hours a week without wine in their life, kill people
@BradBroaddus: Some guy just passed toilet paper under the stall without me even asking. I'm not sure if he is a pervert or a wizard.
@notacroc: [date] HER: the last guy i went out with was as boring as a sack of potatoes ME: [gets up from table] my son is a potato
@shondarhimes: Calling Sony comments"racially insensitive remarks" instead of "racist"? U can put a cherry on a pile of sh*t but it don't make it a sundae.