@TheBoydP: The hardest part of being a dog is not understanding why squirrels don’t want to play with you.
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@Mr_Kapowski: Woman: $150 for mice removal?! Me: Yep *dumps box of snakes* Woman: Get them out! Me: $300 snake removal fee *dumps box of mongooses*
@UniqueDude2: [2 dead cats on ground] Cat Detective: Curiosity killed them but how…*dies* ~later~ [3 dead cats on ground] Cat Detective II: How di…*dies*
@AnniemuMary: I have 11 pictures of myself from high school. My daughter has 11 pictures of herself from this morning.
@Book_Krazy: *Makes bacon *Eats one piece *2 pieces *3 pieces *Eats all the bacon *Hides the evidence 9: Yummm! What's that smell? Me: Cereal